Bad Idea!

Look in the dictionary under "Bad Idea" and you might see this photo. The epitome of a bad decision would be throwing water on an electrical fire. Please tell me this guy isn't going to do this. Please!

Manglish

Manglish=Mangled English. This is how I describe the current state of English usage in the United States today. It pains me as a teacher to say it, but the education system in this country needs a COMPLETE overhaul. It is a complete mess, and you needn't look any further than the signs below. Some of these signs are even on SCHOOLS! Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Manglish!

Football is BACK!

The NFL begins another season on Thursday. To welcome back football, I give you this:

Receiver: Dude! I was open. Why didn't you throw me the ball?

Quarterback: Sorry, Man. I didn't see you.

Bwahahahaha!

Back to work

This is how I felt coming back to work after a three day holiday weekend:

Perpetual Motion

This photo captures the very essence of everything Elliott is about. The boy is in perpetual motion and has more energy than any child I have ever known. This is why he ALWAYS wears us out! Note the fireman boots. He wears them everywhere he goes (with NO socks!)

Do not enter!

Husbands, fathers, and sons out there... who among us has not heard this before? "Don't walk on the kitchen floor! I just mopped it!" You also know there are severe consequences for tracking onto a freshly mopped floor. I guess this is why I thought the following little scenario was so funny. The picture is the icing on the cake.

Willy Wonka

The great comedic actor, Gene Wilder, died this week. He played a lot of great roles, but he is probably most well known for playing Willy Wonka. Remember the beginning of the movie when Willy Wonka limps gingerly out of the factory with the aid of a cane only to do a somersault and pop up with a big smile on his face? Gene Wilder revealed he told the director he would only take the role if he was allowed to do that. The director asked why. Wilder said because from that point on, nobody would know if Wonka was lying or telling the truth. The director agreed and the rest is history. Remember the end of the movie when Charlie learns he will inherit the chocolate factory from Willy Wonka when he dies? Well, Charlie's wait is over... Willy Wonka died this week and Charlie is moving in.

Wonka: What do you think of my chocolate factory, Charlie?

Charlie: I think it's the most wonderful place in the whole world!

Wonka: I'm glad to hear you say that, Charlie, because I'm giving it to you!

Cow Jokes

What do you call a cow with no legs?

"Ground" beef


What do you call a cow with two legs?

"Lean" beef


What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

An "udder" failure


And then there's this one...

My Home Indiana

This is not far off from the truth. We have the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and a whole bunch of corn. I mean a whoooooooooooooooole bunch! Indiana. My home.

A Sad Day

August 31st is always a sad day for me. It was on this day in 1990 that my dad passed away. He died of leukemia at the young age of 47. I can't believe he has been gone for 26 years. I still miss him a lot.

To compound the sorrow of this day. We just received word that Tami's Aunt Alice died this morning. This is my mother-in-law's sister from Martinsville, Virginia. Tami went down last week to say her goodbyes because we knew her time was growing short. My sympathies are with the Bryant family today.

Much grief and sadness today :-(