Clowns... not funny

I'm sure you've heard about the clowns all over the country scaring the daylights out of people. Well... The creeper clown fad has finally hit close to home. Today a creepy clown was spotted next to my school. This caused a collective meltdown that bordered on mass hysteria. Our Principal sent a letter home to parents. Parents were called to pick up their children after school, and those students not picked up by parents were escorted home by staff members. Yes, folks, all that because some idiot decided to be a copy cat, put on a clown mask and terrorize school children. Way to go, Champ! You're a real tough guy. I hope you got your jollies today, Mr. Creepy Clown. I hope you scare some adult man who sees you for what you are and beats you to a pulp. Scaring school children? Real nice! Thanks for causing a school full of teachers and children to stay longer on a Friday just because you're a coward and get some cheap thrill out of hiding behind a mask. I hope you get caught and get what's coming to you!

Wink and a nod

Guys will understand (wink, wink, nod, nod)
Marriage... ain't nothin' like it, eh fellas? Women... you gotta love 'em!

God's Promise

***NOTE***
As always, ignore the suggested videos after you view mine. I have no control over those and they are NOT videos I have watched.
When God flooded the earth in Genesis, he made a promise that He would never destroy the earth in that manner again. His promise is displayed in a rainbow. Tonight we saw the brightest, most complete rainbow we have ever seen. Click on the video above to see what we were looking at. Gorgeous. Just gorgeous! Soli' Deo Gloria!
Also check out the photos from our front porch:

Plastic Surgery

I'm exhausted after staying up late last night watching the debate and then getting up early and working all day. For this reason I am posting this little chuckler (or should that be little quacker?)

I won't say this cracked me up, but I did find it mildly funny.

Debate!

Kudos to my wife! When we met 27 years ago, I found politics to be boring at worst and remotely tolerable at best. All these many years later she has shown me the fascinating side of politics. At present I faithfully read 6-8 political blogs daily, stay in tune with national issues, and proudly call myself an informed voter.

I have always done my best to steer clear of controversial topics on this blog. I have always preferred to write about topics that are on my mind and to keep things generally light. I will not deviate from that today. In fact, the only thing more controversial than politics is religion. Neither will be discussed here. I will not tell what my political allegiances are or which candidate I am voting for. Heck, most people that read this blog know me well, and probably know if I'm a Democrat or a Republican. Therefore it would be pointless to stump for my candidate in this space.

Why all this political talk? Because tonight is the first presidential debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. Politics and issues aside... I think this debate is going to be fascinating because it is going to be contentious and I believe both candidates are going to come out with teeth and claws. I am not alone in looking forward to this debate. I've heard estimates of nearly 100 million viewers. Those numbers rival any Super Bowl in history (and those are the most watched TV events). This could possibly be the most watched event in television history. That thought is staggering. A political debate to rival Super Bowls? Wow!

Our family is having a watch party tonight. Pizza, beverages, snacks, and two presidential candidates fighting to the virtual death. Super Bowl? Pish posh! Clinton -vs- Trump round 1 is where it's at!

***NOTE***
I mentioned I will not discuss politics or religion here. This is true, but do not take this as me being ashamed of the Gospel. I certainly am not ashamed to proclaim Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I will not deny Him here or anyplace else. I am a reformed Christian who is actively involved in church and I will gladly share the Gospel of Jesus Christ at every opportunity that presents itself.

Reluctant

Through the generosity of a couple at church, Tami and I had the distinct pleasure of attending a one man show at the Aronoff Center last night. "The Most Reluctant Convert" is the story of noted Christian author, C.S. Lewis. The story covers Lewis from his time as a young man when he was an atheist until his conversion to Christianity later in his life. Lewis was played by Max McLean who specializes in Christian themed one man shows. Tami and I saw Mr. McLean perform the Screwtape Letters in Chicago several years ago. He was excellent then, and he was excellent again last night. It was a wonderful time that began with a nice dinner out and ended with a superb show at the Aronoff.

SPIDER!

Please tell me I'm not the only one who finds this funny. Before you get yourselves in an uproar, I am not saying a woman crashing and totaling her vehicle is funny. It is certainly not funny at all. Thank the Lord she only received a minor scratch to her head. What I find funny is the very last line of this story. Look folks, this could happen to anyone. I can certainly see how a spider dropping out of nowhere could freak a person out and cause a wreck. But check out the last line... "There was no sign of the spider after the crash". Are you serious???? This person has a degree in journalism. This person is a professional news reporter and ends the story like that? What other stories has this journalist written? In other news, water is wet and the sun is hot. Are you joking? THERE WAS NO SIGN OF THE SPIDER AFTER THE CRASH????????? And what would they have done if they found the spider? Interviewed him? Arrested him? Sheesh! You have got to be kidding me. This no Podunk USA town. This is in Portland, Oregon. The largest city in the whole state!

Here's the story as it appeared in the newspaper...

PORTLAND, Ore. – Deputies say a spider is to blame for a rollover crash Wednesday morning in Northwest Portland’s Bonny Slope area.
The driver suffered a minor scratch on her hand, officials said.

She told deputies she was near the intersection of NW Thompson and McDaniel Roads when a spider dropped down from her rearview mirror.
She lost control and went off the road, rolling the car in a ditch. Sheriff's deputies said the car was totaled.

The Washington County Sheriff’s Office closed the road to one lane to handle the crash, which was about a half mile from Skyline Boulevard.
There was no sign of the spider after the crash.

Busy!

Life has gotten very, very busy. This place looks pretty good right about now.

Glue!

Oh if this were only a REAL option! I know lots of people that could use this... just sayin'.

Amen!

I don't do a lot of complaining about my job. I am blessed to have a job that has provided for my family the last 27 years. Most of the time if I have something negative to say about the teaching profession, it's in response to someone asking me about education. For some reason people love to pick the brain of teachers regarding the state of the schools in America today. I guess it's because people hear so much about schools and they are looking for an inside scoop into what is really going on.

Anyway, one area where I don't complain is in the area of teachers' salaries. Do I think teachers deserve higher salaries (and in many cases combat pay)? Yes, I do. However, I also know I am fortunate to have all holidays and weekends off. I also enjoy a hefty summer vacation (although it is far from the 3 months people commonly believe we have). I must admit I am amused when students are dismissed for summer break the number of parents who openly state they are dreading having their kids home with them all summer. I jokingly pass this off by saying to the parent, "Tag! You're it!". Funny how some parents do not relish the idea of spending extended time with their own children, yet I spend a large portion of my time with more than twenty at once.

Being a teacher is a noble calling and I am proud to have served the students of St. Bernard Elementary for 27 years. The profession is not without its challenges, but all in all it's a good career.

Sign me up!

Finally!

Insert card. Receive $50 cash and two hot dogs!

Oh if only...

Tom Hanks

I never really thought about this before, but this person makes an interesting observation... Remind me to never to travel with Tom Hanks.

In Castaway he is in a plane crash and ends up stranded on a desert island
In Apollo 13 he is nearly lost in space forever after a mishap aboard his spacecraft.
In Captain Phillips his cargo ship is hijacked by Somali pirates.
In Sully he makes an emergency landing in a commercial airliner in the Hudson River.

It's official... If Tom Hanks is on my plane, ship, or spaceship... I'm getting off.

Nope!

Have you ever looked at something and thought to yourself, "Nope! Not today!"? The photos below are examples of what might bring about such a reaction.

We are survivors

How did we ever survive as kids? We never had car seats (shucks, we didn't even wear seat belts until the 80's). We didn't wear bike helmets (and we rode our bikes EVERYWHERE!). We rolled down big hills in grocery carts (I'm looking at you little brother!). We had wars with rocks and sticks and managed to avoid injury (to the best of my memory). We played all day in the summer heat and didn't hydrate every 10 minutes. If we wanted a drink, the garden hose was an endless fount of cool refreshment. We played outside after dark and got bitten by mosquitos. I somehow escaped the Zika virus. We played football in the street and somehow avoided being run over by a car. Incredible you say? No, we were smart and got on the sidewalk when a car came down the street. We pretended to go camping and built LITTLE fires using small sticks. Somehow we didn't burn ourselves or burn down any buildings. AMAZING! It must be a miracle that I'm even here to type this today. How in the world did I survive my childhood? It was easy... we were kids and we played with each other outside. We respected each other and had a lot fun. We weren't perfect. We had our arguments and fights. But no matter how mad we got, we were still friends the next day. We never, ever thought of intentionally hurting one another (except for some name calling). We had thick skins and that was the way it was supposed to be. Yes, we were survivors.

New Job

After yesterday's debacle painting crosswalk lines, my boss decided I might be better served painting lane lines on the road.

Just a few beers and I'll get right on painting those white dotted lines...

Just a few

I'll just have a few beers and then get right back to work painting those crosswalk lines...

Finally!

Finally! A store that caters to guys like me. This is where I'm shopping from now on.

Beer Belly's Men's Mart, here I come!

Too Tall

Something tells me this truck is 10'-7" tall. Just sayin'...

Sick Bird

I'm not sure they should be doing this. In fact, I think it's "ill-eagle".

Sorry. Couldn't resist!

I will not forget

I will not blather on about the horrors of September 11, 2001. The fact remains... I will never forget where I was when I heard about the attacks. I will never forget watching on my classroom television as the events of the day unfolded. I will never forget the feelings of sadness and helplessness I felt for the victims of that day. The world is a different place today because of those horrific events 15 years ago. God bless the men and women who lived through the attacks of 9/11 and God bless the first responders who helped on that day and the days thereafter. God Bless America... The greatest nation on the face of the earth.

Running an errand

Here's me calling out to Tami:

"Honey, I'm running out to pick up some aspirin!"



Hee! Hee!

Aspirin... riiiiiiiiiiiiiight!

God Bless America!

Almost finished...

Proud 4th graders in front of the finished product. God Bless America!

Flag Progress

Progress continues on my school's 9/11 flag project. Now we are just awaiting white stripes and more stars.

15 years already!

On Sunday, our nation commemorates 9/11. Fifteen years since the worst terrorist attack on American soil since Pearl Harbor. This event changed the world forever and has shaped our nation over the last 15 years. Some for the better, some not. Today I stand in my classroom and teach 8 and 9 year old children. The events of 9/11 happened long before they were born and these children have no historical reference for these horrific acts. 2001 may as well be a thousand years ago. To a fourth grader, 15 years probably seems like a thousand.

Today my school is doing its part to never forget the events of that terrible day. At a time when patriotism is arguably at an all-time low, I am proud to say my school is doing something to turn that trend around. The students of St. Bernard Elementary are weaving a crepe paper flag into the school yard fence. I am posting photos of the progress so far, and I will do my best to get a photo of the finished product. Stay tuned and God Bless America!