Full of it!

Recently one of my students was being especially difficult. This in and of itself is not unusual. However, this particular behavior problem was a bit ridiculous. The student in question was sitting next to an open window and was complaining saying he couldn't breathe. The truth is, he didn't want to sit next to the window because his friend was on the other side of the room, not because he couldn't breathe. He was faking because he thought I would change his seat and move him closer to his friend. PFFFFFFTTTTTTTT!!!!!!! I wasn't buying it. He just kept whining and complaining thinking he would wear me down and I would change my mind. It didn't work. I told the student that since he hadn't stopped complaining in over fifteen minutes I was confident he was having no problem getting air into his lungs. Unwilling to give up, the student tried to up the ante. His next ploy was to tell me he had "eczema". I knew he meant "asthma", but I didn't tell him that. I reasserted my position and told him he would remain in his current seat no matter what he said. After more whining and complaining he finally gave up and realized I was an immovable force. The score: Teacher 1, Student 0. A few hours later this same student was at recess playing a rough, vigorous game of basketball. Never being one to pass up an opportunity, I approached the student and asked him how his "eczema" was doing (knowing full well he had been full of boloney earlier). He said he felt fine. I pressed him and asked him how he could play basketball outside, but not sit near an open window. In all seriousness he told me this was different air. Different air? Yeah, right! I then told him that's not the way "eczema" works. I went on and told him the air coming in the window was the same air as on the basketball court. He didn't admit it, but I think he finally realized the jig was up. Exhibiting a defeated look, he made some obnoxious noise and walked away. Game, set and match! The winner, and STILL champion, Mr. Meyer! Kids! What a bunch of amateurs!