A Bad Deal

If the Iran nuclear deal goes through, there can be nothing good that comes from it. The Iranians will be permitted to use their own inspectors and of course they would never be dishonest. We can trust the Iranians, right? Right. I've never heard any "Death to America" chants coming from Iran.

Lizard Love

This picture was too funny to pass up. Can't you just hear the pick up line?

So..... do you come here often?

The Pope

So, a good friend of mine went to Philadelphia to see the Pope. Apparently he found a good spot along the parade route. He was able to snap the following photo. Pretty cool, huh?

It's Coming!

The weather officially turned today. Summer is gone and autumn has arrived in earnest. I think we all know what comes next...

It's coming!

Pumpkin Spice

This trend is getting ridiculous. This time of year there is pumpkin spice EVERYTHING. Pumpkin spice latte', pumpkin spice tea, pumpkin spice cookies, pumpkin spice doughnuts, pumpkin spice bagels, pumpkin spice muffins, pumpkin spice lotions, pumpkin spice candles, pumpkin spice air freshener. Pumpkin spice this and pumpkin spice that. Pumpkin spice here. Pumpkin spice there. Pumpkin spice all around the square.

The photos below are just jokes, but it does go to the heart of what we see this time of year.

Name that tune

Bonus points to anyone who can name that tune...

Dating my wife

I have preached for a long time on this blog the importance of regularly dating your spouse. No matter how long you've been married, you should always take time to go out on dates with your husband/wife. Admittedly I got away from that practice for too long and have neglected to take my wife on a real date for several months. Last night I worked toward rectifying that situation.

We drove over to Newport and made a stop at The Party Source. They have a great gift section and a lot of really cool foods. We also like looking at the many different kinds of wine and always think how fun it would be to sample them. From there we went over to Newport on the Levee and took a walk along the river and then on the Purple People Bridge. While walking we saw people dressed in all sorts of crazy costumes and found out they were there for the Cincinnati Beer Run. After more walking we stumbled upon the Newport Oktoberfest. There was also a Reds game going on across the river. In other words, there was a lot going on along the riverfront last night and we soaked it all in. The photos below show my lovely date for the evening and some not-so-good pictures of the sunset across the river (Cruddy cell phone cameras). Money is a bit tight right now, so we didn't want to go out for an expensive dinner. This walk along the river and the accompanying festivities were free. The weather was perfect, the backdrop was gorgeous and the company was divine. A wonderful evening all around.

No post

No post tonight. When I got home from work, Tami and I left for our long overdue date night. We had a wonderful time. Details tomorrow.

Food for thought

Just wondering...

Why do we put round pizzas in square boxes and cut them into triangles to eat them?

My mind is a twisted, dark place, isn't it?

Costco

Sam's Club? Costco? You've been there. Warehouse stores that require you to purchase a membership for the privilege of shopping in their store and then tell us we save enough money to pay for the membership many times over. They say we save money by buying in bulk. Theoretically it's a good concept and it works... as long as you only buy what you you truly need. I mean honestly... who really needs a five gallon bucket of ketchup or a 50 pound bag of rice? Don't get me wrong. We are Costco members and we love it. Sometimes we make a trip just because we like to look around. But this is always risky. We never "just look around". We almost always buy something and it's usually something we don't really need. In fact, we end up buying a lot of stuff we don't need. But I digress... Costco is a good place for buying lots of things. They have awesome deals on rotisserie chickens, meats, toilet tissue, paper towels, coffee, gasoline and lots of other things. Believe me, we wouldn't trek all the way to Springdale if it wasn't somehow worth our while. We also buy more than just food and other staples. We purchased our flat screen TV, credenza, ottoman, printer and glasses at Costco. We also do a lot of Christmas shopping there. It truly is a great place, but you can drop a bundle when you really don't intend to.

Resistance is futile

You all know I try to CONDUCT myself properly. And since I don't have much ENERGY tonight, I thought I would RELAY the following joke. Sorry, folks. I just couldn't RESIST putting it on the blog. Don't blow a FUSE when you see it. I think it's funny, but I'm just WIRED that way.

(In case you don't get it... that's a resistor).

Fall!

Today is the first day of fall, but you'd never know it looking outside. It appears summer intends to stick around a bit longer and that is fine with me.

Although the weather says summer, the calendar says fall and my annual autumn bout with the blues is starting to rear its ugly head. With the arrival of October late next week, I know the blues will only get worse. I have no idea why this happens to me, but I tend to think it's because some important people in my life died in the fall. It probably has something to do with the school year starting again. Whatever the cause, these blues are a very real part of my life every year.

The only thing worse than the autumn blahs is the winter blues. Oh joy!

Garbage Truck!

I just HAD to share this photo. Young Mr. Elliott Morton, wearing his fireman helmet backward, doughnut glaze on his face and looking out the window. To his sheer joy and delight, he sees the garbage truck coming down the street. I just love the pure and innocent look of wonder on his face. Oh, to be two again! When the garbage truck coming to your house makes your whole day!

Sunset

I love sunsets. There is something so majestic and beautiful about watching the light of the day fade and seeing the colors explode and change as dusk turns to night. Last night as we were driving home from church, Tami and I were awestruck at the sunset that was unfolding before our very eyes. We drove to the lake (which is only about a half mile from our house) and looked out over the water to soak in this view.

It is beyond me how any human being can gaze on such beauty and think this is all part of some big accident. Some big bang that brought the grandeur of creation into being. How any person can discount God's gorgeous creation and chalk it up to happenstance is mind boggling to me. God reveals himself in the glory of His creation and there are few times when it is more apparent than in a sunset.

Soli Deo Gloria! To God alone be the glory.

More Funny Stuff

Didn't like the rhino artist? What about this one?

The Nose Knows

Did you know your nose is always in your field of vision, but your brain chooses to ignore it? It's true. I guess the same can't be said for the poor ol' rhinoceros. I don't know why this struck me as so funny.

It's a BOY!

I've been waiting to share this news for a long time. Tami and I are going to be grandparents again! Our daughter, Jessi is pregnant and is due on January 24th. We attended a gender reveal party today and found out Sveta and Elliott are going to have a little brother. Yup! Another boy for the Morton family!

Here are some pictures of the pink and blue party BEFORE the gender of the baby was revealed:

I particularly liked this idea... Nuts and no nuts. Teehee! It was also reported that if there weren't kids at the party the cake would have said, "I'm only here for the sex". Clever!

Here's the moment of the reveal... quite possibly one of my favorite photos EVER!

And here is the cake AFTER we found out the baby is a boy:

Meat and Pudding

Are there any Pink Floyd fans out there? If so, you'll recognize the reference to Pink Floyd's "Another Brick in the Wall" in the photo below. This is a place I want to shop. Any butcher who makes a classic rock reference in the meat department is okay with me.

For those who don't know, at the very end of "Another Brick in the Wall", a father is heard yelling this to his son:

"If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat!?" "You! Yes, you! Behind the bikesheds, stand still laddie!"

In England, pudding is what we call cake. This father is telling his son if he doesn't eat his dinner, he won't get any dessert. The lyrics don't really mean anything. It's just a funny ending to a really good song.

Female Referee

The NFL has hired its first female referee. I'm thinking this opens up the game for a lot of new scenarios on the field.

How about this one?

Female ref blows whistle and throws penalty flag.

Player: What did I do wrong?

Female ref: No response

Player: What did I do wrong, ref?

Female ref: If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you!


Or how about this one?

Female ref blows whistle and throws penalty flag.

Female ref: That's offensive holding. 10 yard penalty.

Player: But ref, I wasn't holding. It wasn't me!

Female ref: WHATEVER!


Or this one?

Female ref blows whistle and ANGRILY throws penalty flag on the turf.

Player: What's the matter, ref? You seem upset.

Female ref: It's nothing. I'm fine.

Buffalo

My cornball son sent this to me a few days ago. He's a chip off the old block! We both like goofy humor!

I'm a sucker!

We watched the grandchildren tonight. Their parents went out on a much deserved date.

We were having difficulty getting Elliott to eat anything for dinner. After much consternation, we resorted to tactics that parents and grandparents have used for centuries... bribery! We promised Elliott if he ate a bowl of oatmeal he could have a sucker. Elliott ate every bite of his oatmeal and then promptly asked for the promised sucker. I marched him into the kitchen and opened the candy drawer and found it EMPTY. Elliott's mommy had recently discarded all of the candy in the house. Oh no! The look on Elliott's face went straight to my heart and I knew exactly what I had to do. I did what any self-respecting Goppa would do... I hopped into the car and drove to the store for a bag of lollipops. Upon returning with the sweet treats, I knew I had saved the day. By golly, my grandchildren wanted lollipops and nothing was going to stop me from getting them. I'm such a sucker!

Debate

Tonight eleven GOP Presidential hopefuls will take the stage to debate one another. Hopefully a true candidate emerges and sends Trump packing. Trump is a misogynistic clown. Definitely not someone worthy of running for President, the leader of the free world.

Whoever wins the GOP nomination may find themselves running against Bernie Sanders, a self professed socialist. Do we really want a socialist president? Do we as a nation really believe socialism is what is best for this country? Have a look at other countries that have operated under a socialist government. How did that work out for them? Yeah, you get my point.

Waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

The deed is done. The pool is covered and closed. Waaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!

Here's the sad scene:

Covered in sadness

Today is a sad day. It's a day I dread like few others. It's the day I close the pool for the season. It's a sure sign summer has come to an end and shorter days and colder temperatures are close at hand. I can already feel my yearly autumn depression setting in. Right now it's mild, but I know as October and November roll around, the blues will intensify. I know, I Know... count your blessings and quit whining!I get it. It's just that I love the warm weather so much and closing the pool signifies the end of everything I love about the warm months and the beginning of what I dread about the cold months. There is something so comforting about looking out my back door and seeing the blue waters of the pool. Now I get to look out my back door and see the dank blackness of the pool cover. It's almost poetic. The pool cover matches my cold, dark feelings that come with this time of year.

Sorry to be so dramatic. I just hate closing my pool.

Too Short

Ladies and gentlemen... sorry for the short posts lately. I was a bit under the weather over the weekend and wasn't exactly feeling the blog vibe. I am feeling much better today and should be back to my "Bloggy" self real soon.

In the meantime, you can pray for my good friend, Darla, from church. She is younger than me and is very ill. She is currently in the Cleveland Clinic undergoing a battery of tests which initially haven't yielded favorable results.

Sleeping

Tami has always said I can fall asleep really fast. I have to admit it's true.

One moment I can say I'm not tired. The next moment I'm sawing logs.

This could work

Ummmmm... No comment from me.

Kickin' Back

I just had to share this photo. If you didn't know better, you'd think this was an 80 year old man sitting in his rocking chair, remembering the days of yore. In reality it's a two year old pining for some time outside. How cute is this?

9/11

As a Social Studies teacher, I am required (and rightly so) to discuss (and honor) the events of September 11th, 2001. It is so strange to think the horrible terrorist attacks of that day occurred 5 years before my current fourth graders were even born. They must view 9/11 the same way I view the attack on Pearl Harbor. We know something horrible happened, but have no real frame of reference because it didn't happen in our lifetime.

In class today I had an age appropriate discussion and attempted to convey (without being too graphic) the evil deeds and horror that took place in New York, Washington D.C., Shanksville, Pennsylvania, and the skies over the entire eastern half of the United States.

Today we remember the innocent victims of those heinous acts and honor those who assisted in search and rescue in the days that followed.

God Bless America!

Hillary

I've never been much for posting political stuff on this blog. However, as Hillary's poll numbers continue to plummet, I couldn't resist posting these:

Lightning Strike

Last Saturday I attended the Reds game with some family members. It was the afternoon game of a day/night doubleheader. The night game (which we did not attend) was riddled with thunderstorms which caused a significant rain delay. The photo below was taken during one of the thunderstorms. It's strange enough for lightning to hit one of the light stanchions, but what makes this stranger is that we were sitting close this very spot mere hours earlier. I have seen the video of the lightning strike, so there is no possibility the photo is doctored in any way. Cool photo, huh?

Where to go?

I would have no problem figuring out which restroom to enter. If you were faced with these restroom doors would you know where to go?