Shingle Shuffler

I learned something today. A roofer I ain't! I helped a group of men put a new roof on the church today, but my contribution was minimal. I started the day as a go-fer. Go-fer a hammer. Go-fer some nails. Go-fer some shingles. Later in the day I was promoted to "Shingle Shuffler". It may sound like an important job, but it really wasn't. A shingle shuffler carries packs of shingles up the ladder and onto the roof. Once the shingles are on the roof, the shuffler opens the pack and distributes the individual shingles to the guys nailing them into place.

Although I don't consider my contribution significant, I am happy to report the job is done. It was a beautiful day to work outside and the Lord's House is now protected from the elements for years to come.

Eighty!

The pool water is 80 degrees. That's good swimming water! Even the faint of heart enjoys 80 degree water.

I've never kept official records, but I'd be willing to bet this is the earliest in the season we've ever hit 80.

I've only got one thing to say about that... Come on in, the water's fine!

Irony

I would not say what I saw this morning was uproariously funny. I wouldn't even say it made me laugh out loud. However, I did see something this morning that broke up the monotony of my morning commute and made me smile. I saw a tow truck being towed by another tow truck. In a sense, the tow-er was now the tow-ee. I found the whole scene to be quite ironic.

It's not much, but it is a little nugget that amused me this morning.

I thought she was RUSSIAN

Last week Sveta was having a tea party with her grandma and she began speaking in a British accent. Her grandma asked if she was British... Sveta replied, "No, I'm Chinese". Hilarious!

That's strange. I thought she was Russian :-)

The countdown continues

This time of year, teachers need to get mighty creative to get students through the last couple weeks of school. Short of standing on my head or dancing a jig, I am willing to do almost anything to keep these kids entertained and in line.

One little trick I use is making up a little poem each day as the days countdown toward summer. Yesterday I said, "9 was fine but 8 is great!". Today I will say, "8 was great, but 7 is heaven!". You get the idea. It's quite simplistic and even a little silly, but the kids seem to enjoy it. As the days dwindle the kids kind of look forward to what the next day's poem will bring. I know you all are just dying to know what the remaining poems are. You are curious, right?

7 was heaven, but with 6 we'll get our kicks!
We liked our 6 kicks, but with five we feel more alive!
We liked five alive, but we love 4 so much more!
We loved 4, but 3 will fill us with glee!
3 filled us with glee, but 2 makes us scream YAHOO!
2's yahoo was not what we anticipated, but 1 is the number we've long awaited.

Today's the last day and you leave me smarter, not dumber
Your elementary days are now finished... I am now happy to say,"Have a nice SUMMER!"

Almost a cop

Michael recently applied for a position as a police officer (Dearborn County Deputy to be more precise). He took the written exam, performed a physical agility and endurance test and went through an interview. He did not get the job, but did hear that everyone was quite impressed with him. The reason he was rejected had nothing to do with his performance. It was his age. Michael is twenty and a half... you need to be twenty one to carry a firearm. Even though he didn't get the job, he was encouraged by the report he got from the police department. At least now he has his foot in the door and they know who he is. Watch out, everybody... Barney Fife will be on the job soon enough!

Smelly!

Sveta has never been known to have much of a filter on her cute little mouth. This past week was no different.

After working in the yard on a hot day, Sveta's other grandma suggested they get together and do something fun. Sveta said, "Okay, but let's wait until you smell better". Hahahaha! Some people may be offended being told they are giving off a malodorous air... but not grandparents. Our grandchildren could honestly say anything and it wouldn't phase us one bit.

Sveta's other grandma had a smelly day and I had a slick head. It's all good!

Duck, Duck, Goose!

Did you ever play Duck Duck Goose when you were a kid? It's a very popular game amongst pre-schoolers and kindergarteners. I stumbled upon this comic and it made me laugh a little.

Memorial Day

Today I will participate in my third cookout in three days. That's what Americans do on Memorial Day weekend... we grill out, drink lemonade and have parties in our backyards, on our decks and patios. We all dress up in our red, white and blue and swim in our pools or play yard games. It's a glorious, yet unofficial beginning to summer. I have no problem with this, in fact I rather enjoy it. However, let us not lose sight of what this day is REALLY about. It's about honoring those men and women who fought and died to preserve the freedoms we all enjoy and yes, even take for granted. This holiday weekend is not just about those who made the ultimate sacrifice. It is also meant to help us remember and honor any person who ever served (or is currently serving) in our armed forces. So today as you bite into that burger or All-American hot dog or as you sip your favorite beverage with family and friends, take a moment to remember those who fought for this great nation and the freedoms we have.

Happy Memorial Day, everyone.

God Bless America!

Grilling en masse

Everybody in the world knows I love to grill (including everybody at my church). We had s church picnic today and the Pastor asked me to grill the food... FOR THE WHOLE CHURCH! I knew it would be a challenge to grill for a hundred people, but I was up to it.

I didn't count, but I'm estimating I grilled about 250 brats, metts and dogs today. Let me tell you folks... this was no easy task, but I upheld my reputation as the grill master. I didn't burn one thing and everybody seemed to enjoy the food. Everything was hot and grilled to tasty perfection.

It was a nice picnic with good food and good fellowship.

Just a swingin'!

Swinging is hard work!

Jump!

The pool is open! Last one in's a rotten egg!

I'm an idiot!

Well... the problem of the pool leak has been solved. When I initially made the connection, unbeknownst to me the threads were cross threaded and the seal was not watertight. I'm such an idiot! Although I AM thankful the problem had a simple resolution.

Take that, Mr. Murphy!

Furthermore, the pool cover has been removed and the ladder has been installed. As I type this, water is flowing into the pool and it should be at its optimal level in the morning.

Tomorrow I will add the chemicals and vacuum. The pool should be operational by Sunday. Let the fun begin!

Welcome back, Mr. Murphy!

Murphy's Law states that if anything CAN go wrong... it will. After a brief absence, Mr. Murphy paid me a visit last night.

After hooking up the pool pump and all the hoses, I began to top off the water level to get the pool ready for its opening day this season. As the water level rose, I noticed a huge problem. One of the hoses was leaking badly. Actually leaking is a bit of an understatement. I think a more accurate description would be GUSHING! At first I thought I had forgotten to tighten something (or at the very least didn't tighten something enough). A quick check revealed that everything seemed to be assembled properly. At this point I have no idea why this gusher of a leak is happening, but I will be taking a trip to the pool supply store to see if I can get some answers. This problem is truly maddening. I have connected the plumbing for the pool for eight years and never had an issue. This year I did everything EXACTLY the same way and WHAMMO... big leak!

Welcome back, Mr. Murphy. I've been expecting you!

Tick Tock

As I type this, there are less than 11 days of school remaining. The pain of a very difficult and challenging school year will be quickly behind me and summer will erase most of the stress I've built up. When going through trials and tribulation, it seems like time stands still. But we know that's not true. Time continues its relentless march onward. Whoever said, "And this too shall pass", sure knew what he was talking about. Whoever said, "It's always darkest before the dawn", also knew what he was talking about. It always happens that whatever is troubling us seems to pass just as soon as it seems we can't handle any more. Time most certainly heals all wounds... and this school year has inflicted plenty of wounds (some still fresh). Summer will be here soon enough. The stress of work will soon be replaced with sipping lemonade by the pool and grilling burgers for dinner. Can't wait!

Hail to the Chief!

My little brother, Kerry, is a Captain for the St. Bernard Fire Department. The current fire chief is retiring next month and the department recently administered a civil service exam in order to hire the next chief. I am proud to announce my brother earned the top score on the exam and will be the new fire chief in St. Bernard beginning next month. I am so proud of his accomplishment and I am eager for the next phase of his life. Obviously being the fire chief will bring a complete change in Kerry's job. He will switch from fire fighting to the administrative side of running the entire fire department. Way to go, little brother! You've done the family proud!

Getting Closer!

We are one step closer to summer fun. The pool filter and pump are hooked up and ready to go. In the next few days I will remove the cover, top off the water level, clean the pool and add the chemicals. Those are the last steps to be taken before the pool is ready for swimmers. Make no mistake... the water will be cold, but hey, if you wanna take a dip... by all means... knock yourself out :-)

Time is precious

Time is precious in so many different ways. This is not going to be some sappy post about how we should cherish every moment with our family or how life is short and we need to live every day to the fullest. While those things are true, this post is much simpler than that.

I have been looking for a spare moment to open my pool... and I can't seem to find the time. If I'm not working at school, I've been helping Tami with her estate sale business. If there has been time available, it has been raining. In short, I can't seem to catch a break. No worries though. The pool will somehow be opened and ready for business for our Memorial Day Party. Burgers, dogs, lemonade and a dip in the pool for the brave of heart.

Ready or not, summer is coming!

ARRESTED!

A sad development over the weekend... My grandchildren were arrested for doing the Lord's work. Apparently Bible smuggling is a serious offense in some countries.

Things will get better

I haven't posted much lately. The end of the school year is INSANELY busy for teachers. Taking that into consideration, and also considering I have spent the majority of the last two weekends helping Tami with her estate sale business, that doesn't leave much time for anything else... especially lounging around on my computer. Stick with me folks. Things will slow down and I will be able to make some quality posts again soon. Thanks for checking in regularly.

By the way, speaking of Tami's new business... yesterday she wrapped up her second estate sale. Things went very well and she has done a great job. I am very proud of what she has done. She has worked very hard and has two satisfied customers. Way to go, Honey!

Funny Stuff

I just love Bible humor!

Grandchildren

No Post today---

Busy at school and babysat for the grandkids this evening.

The only thing I will say is my cheeks hurt from smiling the whole time and my heart aches because I had to leave them.

What a good night!

Good Friends!

I've had a rough couple of days. I was informed (and given very little notice) that I would be out of my classroom attending professional development meetings for two days this week. For a teacher, this is a nightmare scenario. It's a lot of extra work preparing for a substitute teacher and there are always messes to clean up upon return to the classroom. Thankfully the messes awaiting me tomorrow are quite minimal because of the help of some very good friends. My teaching partners Michelle and Louise went above and beyond to help me during this difficult time. I am so grateful to work with such wonderful people. These ladies are incredible colleagues.

I've always said the staff at my school is much more like a family than a group of colleagues. That point has never been more evident than it was yesterday and today. Thank you, ladies, for making it as painless as possible to leave my classroom for two days. I am eternally grateful.

The Opera

Here's another indication of the type of children I teach. I was reviewing the spelling words for the week and one of the words was "opera" (as in Phantom of the OPERA). Before I could even say the word, one of my students blurted out "Oprah" (as in Winfrey). I politely told the student the word was opera and not Oprah. Instead of nodding with approval or simply accepting my explanation, the student proceeded to argue with me. He insisted it was Oprah and I strongly asserted the word was opera. After a little back and forth I told the student the word was opera and that was final... I ended with telling him if he thought the word was Oprah then he was flat wrong. Sorry you little whippersnapper... Don't try to tell me one of my spelling words is flippin' Oprah Winfrey!

Rain and Sun

On this rainy night, I'm dreaming of the sun. While dreaming of the sun, I remembered something that had an impact on me during our last cruise.

On previous cruises we always wanted to get up and watch the sunrise, but for one reason or another always missed it. During this past cruise we were determined to see a sunrise... and we did. I can tell you watching the sun rise over the ocean was nothing short of breathtaking. I was not surprised at the splendor of the event, but must admit I was quite surprised at how quickly the sun cleared the horizon. In fact, it appeared to jump right out of the water. I think the reason I was so surprised is because the view of the sunrise around here is obstructed by buildings and trees. We never actually see the moment the sun peeks above the horizon. All my life I thought the sun rose very slowly. Boy, was I wrong. On the water, there is nothing but miles and miles of ocean expanse and a clear view of the horizon. The sun rises at a rapid rate and you really could miss it if you are not paying attention. I am so happy we got to see the sunrise over the blue waters of the Atlantic. It was well worth it!

I'm slick!

Out of the mouths of babes!

On Mothers Day we went out to dinner with the grandchildren (and their parents of course). After dinner I was playing with Sveta when she reached out and touched my forehead. She must have been drawn to the shiny skin. She asked, "Why is your head so slick?". After a chuckle I explained that I have oily skin and that oil is slick. I could tell she didn't understand and I tried to explain how everybody has oil on their skin, but some people have more than others. Still not understanding I told her she would have oily skin one day and would understand then. She seemed satisfied with that answer.

So until Sveta gets the concept of skin oil, I guess I'll just have to be slick.

My biggest FAN

I know I say this all the time, but you can file this under things I think are cute and you probably don't.

Elliott learned a new trick. He loves ceiling fans. He is enthralled by the spinning blades and will watch them seemingly forever. Now, all you have to do is say the word "fan" and he looks up. You'd have to see it in person, but it really is cute!

Free Food!

I had one of THOSE moments today. The kind that open my eyes to what is becoming of our country.

One of our spelling words this week is "cafeteria". I explained how schools and hospitals have a cafeteria and they are places for feeding large amounts of people. I went further with my explanation and told them about a restaurant that used to be in business in this area. If you're old enough, you'll remember Morrison's Cafeteria. My Grandpa Meyer absolutely loved that place. I explained to my students that you went through the line and chose all your food items al a carte and then paid for your selections when you reached the end of the line. It was at this point one of my students questioned why you had to pay for your food. It took me a moment, but I finally realized what this student was saying... Food in the school cafeteria is FREE, therefore food in ALL cafeterias must be free. I wanted to pull out what's left of my hair and explain that cafeteria style was a way of getting food and eating... cafeteria does not mean free food. Sheesh!

Many of these kids have no concept that food costs money. Much of the food in their lives is given to them. It's provided through government assistance at the grocery store or through the free lunch program at school. I know it seems this way to them, but SOMEBODY is paying for their food.

Super Mom!

Admit it guys... it's true. There is no other explanation.

Happy Mothers Day!

Happy Mothers Day to all you wonderful moms out there. Thank you to my amazing wife, the mother of my three children. She does incredible things every day. Thank you to my own mother for all she has done. And a special greeting goes out to my eldest daughter, Jessi... a great mom. Happy Mothers Day also to my mother-in-law who did a great job with her own family. The fact is, I am surrounded by women who are all excellent examples of what a good mother should be.

Happy Mothers Day, Ladies!

Success!

A few months ago I made a post about Tami's new business--- Downsize Solutions. After advertising in local publications she didn't get any response at all. Recently she was about ready to chalk up the business as a dead end when she got a lead on an estate sale. She bid on the job and got it.

She had her first estate sale yesterday and today. Right now I can tell you things went very, very well! The client and the company both made a favorable profit. I am very proud of her. The sale could not have gone any better. The client gave glowing reviews and promised to spread the word loud and proud about this new local business.

As I type this, Tami has at least two more estate sales booked. She also has leads on several more. Things are off to a good start and it will be very interesting to see where this all leads.

Way to go, Honey!

Won't be long!

As we work our way into the second week of May, the time is drawing near to open the Meyer Resort. The Meyer Resort is otherwise known as our above ground pool. Believe me, it's nothing fancy, but we sure do enjoy it. I'm targeting a Memorial Day opening, but it really depends on the weather and time. It takes the better part of a full day to do the job right... I'll let you know when it's time to take a dip.

How I feel

This is how I'm feeling right about now:

Nothing significant

Sorry folks. No significant posts today. I was very busy getting the yard ready for my brother-in-law's retirement party. We will be hosting it on Saturday.

Look for a better post tomorrow.

Elliott Video Part 2

The video of Elliott I posted yesterday seemed to be working fine. This morning as I logged onto the blog, it doesn't seem to be working. I'm just wondering if you all are able to view it or not. It seems strange that it was working last night, but not this morning.

I was so happy it seemed to be working, but now I'm bummed that it's not.

P.S.
My colleague pointed out the video may just be blocked by my school's wi-fi network. I hope that's all it is :-)

Elliott Video

I have been looking for ways to enhance the blog. I certainly don't want it to become stale. As a result, I thought I'd dabble in posting personal videos (i.e. those not from Youtube). Here's my first try. I hope it works because this is one of my favorites. To view the video in full screen, click the lower right side of the video. Make sure the sound is on too. I know you won't enjoy this is as much as I do, but here it is anyway :-)

Implosion!

You all know me pretty well by now. When relaying a story or reporting events, I am not in the habit of exaggerating or sensationalizing things. I'm not much for adding details for dramatic effect. In general, I tell it like it is. You also know I spend  lot of time telling about my life as a teacher. Readers of this blog are familiar with my challenges of teaching low-income students in an inner city school district. Since the first day of this school year, I have been working my tail off keeping my sixth grade students on task, learning and trying to avoid situations where they want to take each other's heads off. In short, these kids fight ALL THE TIME and most of my day is spent trying to help them get along (a task I usually fail miserably at). This has been an uphill battle all year long and every day is a delicate balancing act. With that being said, I can tell you things are beginning to crumble around me. The best word I can think of to describe what is going on is IMPLOSION. My sixth grade class is imploding before my very eyes (despite my best efforts to prevent such happenings).

Webster's dictionary defines implosion as: an inward collapse from the effects of outside pressure.

Any shaky supports that have kept this class together throughout the year are now beginning to fail. It started slowly at first, but the implosion has increased in speed and intensity within the last week or so. I have sixth graders biting each other (yes, I'm serious... biting), choking each other (yes, I'm serious about this too), fist fighting, pushing, shoving, kicking and constantly arguing. I feel like I'm always rushing around putting out fires. Then as soon as I put out one fire, another springs up behind me. Then when I put that fire out, another one flares up... and so on, and so on, and so on.

I'm no mind reader, but I bet I know what you're thinking. "How in the world can you get ANY teaching done with all that going on?". I only have one reply... good question! How indeed!

I hope you don't think I'm being dramatic. As I stated before, that's really not my style. It's just a sad commentary of my daily reality. Things are imploding around me and I feel hopeless and powerless to stop them.

Don't say... THIS!

In honor of National Teacher Day, I thought it might be helpful to tell you some things you should never say to a teacher. Clink the link to find out what they are:

Never say THIS to a teacher

National Teacher Day

Today is National Teacher Day. That and $2.79 will get me a cup of coffee at Starbucks. The thought of teachers having a day dedicated to them is not a big deal to me. Honestly, I think things like bosses day, secretaries day, nurses day and teachers day are frivolous and silly. I don't really need a National Teachers Day to feel appreciated or to receive recognition. The truth is, all I need is for a parent to say, "Mr. Meyer, thanks for teaching my child this year". Or a student to say, "Mr. Meyer, thanks for being my teacher". A simple thank you and acknowledgement that my job is not easy or glorified babysitting will suffice. National Teacher Day? No thank you.

24

The number of the day is 24.

There are 24 days of school left. I am finishing my 24th year of teaching. And..... for the first time in a long while, one of our favorite TV shows returns tonight. "24"--- the real time, fast action, nerve wracking drama will have our friend, Jack Bauer saving the world in some new and creative ways.

Welcome back, "24". We've missed you!

Happy Star Wars Day

Happy Star Wars Day! Today is the 4th of May... So, May the fourth be with you!

BINGO!

You know all that lamenting I've been doing about the OAA? Well, my sister saw this today and sent it to me. I realize this was written mostly in jest, but there is way more truth to this than anybody would ever, ever realize. The only thing missing is the element of discipline problems and habitually disruptive students. Other than that, I'll let the graphic speak for itself.

Congrats!

Congratulations to my brother-in-law, Dale Randall. He retired from Seagrams/Proximo distillers after many, many years on the job. I am very happy for him and wish him the best. 11 more years until I get to retire!

Mulching Again

Not much time to blog today. I am slinging mulch in my own yard. A few weeks ago it was the church, today it was my own yard.Things are starting to look up, although there is much work remaining to be done. I'll get there... it just takes time and time is something I don't have a lot of right now.

A fair question

At the end of the long, grueling, pressure filled OAA testing session a student asked me a question that I thought was very, very revealing. She asked if studying and preparing for the OAA was the ONLY reason kids go to school. I wanted to tell her no, but that is not the actual truth. In honesty, the only thing we are judged on is the results of these standardized tests. I kind of bent the truth a little and said it was one of the main reasons kids go to school, but not the only reason. I found it amazing that a kid has picked up on the ridiculousness of spending an entire school year preparing for a one day, two hour test.

Make no mistake... I am not against testing. It is a good measure of student progress and growth and a way of keeping teachers accountable (another thing I am not against). But I do find there is way too much emphasis put on these tests and their results.

So, to answer the question from a very intuitive student... "Mr. Meyer, is studying for the OAA the only reason we go to school?". Yes. Yes it is, I'm sorry to say.

Not in my hands...

The OAA testing is now behind us. Thank you to anyone who remembered to pray for me and my students. It's all in God's hands now. Actually it's been in God's hands the whole time, but you know what I mean.

I am not going to worry over the test results. I did my best and so did the kids. Nothing more can be asked of any of us.

On another note--- 5 more weeks of school (i.e. 24 days)... but who's counting?

Disconnected

I always carry my cell phone... always. This morning was no different. I had my phone at work and it was functioning perfectly. Later in the afternoon I attempted to use it and got a recording from Verizon saying my call could not be completed and to try again later. If I had further questions I was instructed to contact customer service at Verizon. UGH! This type of thing has happened on rare occasions before. Although I was irritated and annoyed, I was willing to wait out this apparent glitch. A little while later my teaching partner and good friend, Michelle said we should test the phone. While she stood next to me I dialed her number and waited. Nothing happened. Then she decided to dial my number to see what would happen. My phone did not ring, but Michelle's phone connected and she started talking to somebody... but who? It didn't take long for me to realize that Michelle was talking to MY WIFE. Tami informed Michelle that she had called my phone. Are you confused? I'm guessing you are because I was totally confused. I insisted Tami couldn't have my phone because I was very clearly holding my phone in my own hand. Then once Tami explained, all the puzzle pieces fell into place.

Here's what happened... during the afternoon Tami visited the Verizon store without my knowledge and got us new phones (free upgrades). When my new phone was activated at the store, the phone in my pocket was disconnected from service (rendering it useless and explaining why I was getting a recording when trying to make a phone call). Then when Michelle dialed my number, my new phone (which was still in Tami's possession) rang and she answered it. Weird!

In the end, my teaching partner got to talk to my wife on the phone and I didn't. I ended up with a new phone and I will spend the better part of the next month trying to figure out how it works. (my phone number is still the same by the way).

It was a funny end to what was an otherwise stressful day.

May Day!

May Day! May Day! Happy first day of May! Summer is just around the corner! Hooray!